Friday October10th, 2008

TheAuthor · Site Admin Joined: 25 Mar 2006 Posts: 698

I had to post something. This page isn't even done (and it may never be), but I am uninspired, shiftless and this cold will not let me go. All I can do anymore is sleep, eat and play the Sims2.

Seeing as there's nothing anyone can do for me, I'm just going to plug along, I suppose. I haven't drawn a thing since I got Apartment Life and that may have something to do with it.

I just don't have any ideas of what to draw.

TheAuthor · Site Admin Joined: 25 Mar 2006 Posts: 698

Follow-up: Tried drawing some stuff, read a chapter or two in my comics textbook...kept trying to rekindle some spark.

Honestly, I think I'm just bored with LIFE. GTA bores me, GF bores me, the Sims2 is starting to bore me, eating, driving, shopping, hanging out with friends...BORED. Disinterested. I can't get motivated, activated or inspired.

And it's beginning to scare me.

Staying up until 5am and waking at 1pm. Eating when I start shaking. Staying in because I don't want to buy the gas. Even hanging out with people feels wrong. They come over and I tell them to play GTA so I can watch or we just sit there looking awkward. NGH, WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?!

No, I'm not PMSing...unless the P stands for "post".

I still think about GF. I dreamt I was Tlaloc last night on a hideous rampage through a factory, fighting ghosts and people trying to kill me. I let my mind wrap around Roger/Karen, Roger/Hina Ika, Baxter/Anyone else, Tlaloc/Alex and Huitzilopochtli/the world. It's all there. But I can't get it out. It's like be permanently damp.

I've got so many projects I want to follow through with.

Augh. Well. That's enough from me. If you feel like there's anything worth saying (pos/neg) about this page, go ahead. I may finish it for reals one day.

I guess I should just go to bed now and wake up miserable again tomorrow to an empty silent house filled with dying fish and dreams.

veridian · Joined: 22 Aug 2008 Posts: 90 Location: Michigan, USA

Poor Rae, you sound like me when I was about to graduate. I went through the same thing. The only way I got through it was medication, not sure what would help you though. I do hope you find something that interests you again.

TheAuthor · Site Admin Joined: 25 Mar 2006 Posts: 698

I've been tempted recently with meds, but I'm really really against lying to myself through medication.

I think I just need someone to distract me. I'm okay at work, where people berate me just as often as they make me laugh about farts. I get home and nothing matters.

I really don't want my whole life to be about working...

TheAuthor · Site Admin Joined: 25 Mar 2006 Posts: 698

More about today's page and less about my psychosis: Nuuu! Run from the little blue shrimp, Roger! First the blanket, now little shellfish! Aaaaagh!

Roger: D8

veridian · Joined: 22 Aug 2008 Posts: 90 Location: Michigan, USA

Mm... shellfish. He should have a cook out.